MESSAGE
| DATE | 2005-02-27 |
| FROM | Ruben Safir
|
| SUBJECT | Subject: [hangout] Wanted Add - Female replies ONLY
|
newyork.craigslist.org > women seeking men > MENS PERSONAL ADS COMPARED
TO WOMENS
last modified:Wed Jan 19 11:32:48 2005
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MENS PERSONAL ADS COMPARED TO WOMENS
________________________________________________________________________
Reply to: anon-56275478-at-craigslist.org
Date: Wed Jan 19 11:30:31 2005
Mens posting:
Lets fuck !
Womens posting:
You MUST:
- Be over 6'2"
- Be in great shape.
- Be great looking.
- Be educated. I have a masters degree AND a law degree. That means I am
really smart. Did I mention I have a masters degree AND a law degree?
Even though deep down I know I am not that bright I can hide behind
these degrees and pretend I am - phewww!:)
- Have a great job and make lots of money. If you aren't a doctor or
lawyer you aren't good enough cuz they are really, really smart but more
importantly they will make my best girlfirends jealous (bitches !).
- Be able to impress my friends and make them envious and jealous. Oops
I think I mentioned that above. Just want to make sure you know what
your main purpose is.
- Not be too domineering but you aren't a momma's boy either. Meaning
whatever mood I am in I will tell you how to act.
- Like wine. I like Shiraz cuz it's Australian and I am really worldly
and only know Merlot and Shiraz and Shiraz sounds more sophisticated.
- Be well travelled. The bus tour in London was great and staying at the
Paris Hilton just screams culture. It means you are smart, attractive
and cultured if you travel, cuz getting on a plane and staying at the
Hilton takes lots of brains and skill.
- Like jewelry. Tiffany is my very favorite - it is just wonderful. I
love wearing a dog tag around my neck that reads someone elses name.
Besides only 20 million other women have it. I feel so special wearing
the same thing everyone else does.
- Like Starbucks. Even though their coffee really sucks and is way
overpriced I must have it. What would someone think if they saw me
walking with a plain styrofoam cup ???
- Like fine cars. As with jewelry, I have very unique taste in cars as
well - BMW or Mercedes.
- Love Sex and the City because like the girls on the show I have whored
around a ton (I will never admit that to you though) but seeing it done
on TV makes it OK. Because they aren’t just whores, they are rich women
looking for love! They represent sophisticated, educated, tasteful,
classy girls like me. If you are a yuppie and spread your legs for lots
of guys you aren’t a whore – you are just looking for the right guy.
Those uneducated blue collar girls that fuck lots of guys are whores !
But I have a masters degree and a law degree so just because I have had
more men than the urinals at Fenway Park I am not a whore damn it !
- Not ever, ever, ever be worse looking than any of my friends
boyfriends cuz if you are I will try to fuck him behind your back and my
girlfriends back (that bitch!)
- Not ever, ever, ever, mother fucker be less successful than any of my
friends boyfriends. If you are I will try to fuck him behind your back
and my girlfriends back (I hate her !)
- Never bore me. Yes, you guessed it, if you do see above, cuz I am
getting sick of telling your sorry ass how many ways and why I will
cheat on you (sigh!)
- Give me the attention I need but not be too clingy. Again, this all
depends on my mood of the moment. Good luck figuring that out. Oh and if
you aren’t attentive enough or too attentive, see above.
- Have a huge dick. Again, see above, you know by now what will happen
if you don't.
- Constantly be amazing in bed and live up to every fantasy I have ever
had about a man. If you don't I'll be coming home late from work several
times a week.
- Be a Prince or the son of a Prince would be good. I am too stupid to
know that the son of a Prince is still a Prince but I know I want to get
me one. If not a billionaire, millionaire, singer, actor, athlete,
doctor or lawyer (in that order) is acceptable.
Being a psycho or sociopath is OK as long as you meet all the above
criteria. I won't let a small thing like that get in the way if you have
all these other qualities. Just because it didn't work out for Nicole
Simpson or Laci Peterson doesn't mean it won't work for us. And even
though Princess Diana was more miserable than George Bush on Jeopardy I
am sure I will be quite happy being a Princess. At least until the
effect of making my friends really envious and jealous wears off, then I
will find something to hate about you and my life !
Also when I do cheat please know that it will NEVER, EVER, EVER be my
fault - it will be yours.
Please note this is just a partial listing of things I am looking for in
a man. You should know that this list can and will change constantly and
if we do get together there will be an ever changing social contract
that I will constantly amend without you knowing it and worse never tell
you I changed it.
RESPONSES WITHOUT PICS WILL BE IMMEDIATELY DELETED!
I can't wait to hear from you.
this is in or around Manhattan
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
interests
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